How to find out if your child is doing drugs - home drug testing kits

Are you concerned that your son, daughter, or family member is doing drugs? Is the prospect of having to bring them to a clinic too horrible for you to even contemplate? You should take time to consider another option. Why not try home drug-testing as an alternative?

1. Why Home Drug Testing?

Looking at it from an objective point of view, home drug-testing provides a lot of advantages for people who value their privacy among other things. It is also cheaper to buy a do-it-yourself drug testing kit than to go to a drug testing facility and have the examination there. It is less hassle and less worry on your part. It provides anonimity that keeps the sense of privacy surrounding your family intact.

2. Choose Wisely

There are a lot of do-it-yourself drug test kits available in the market today. Some examples of these tests include: urine tests, blood tests, saliva drug tests, etc. By knowing beforehand what kind of test you are pondering to take, you will save on your precious time. The most effective type of drug testing kit is actually the hair testing kit. This can tell you not only if your child has drugs in their system at the time of the test, but over the entirety of the past four months as well!

3. What Can Drug Tests Detect?

- Amphetamines

- Barbiturates

- Cocaine

- Marijuana

- Methamphetamines

- Opiates

These multi-drug tests are very handy as they will screen your loved ones for a wide range of drugs, not just Marijuana. You no longer need to buy a single tester for every type of drug that you fear your children might using. These pose savings for you and again, less hassle.

4. Talk Openly With Your Children

It is critical that you talk openly with your children during the testing process. Let them know that you are doing this because you care so much about them. If you are especially quiet, you can perform a drug test on your child or loved one while they are sleeping - simply clip approximately 40 hairs from them approximately one and one-half inches from the base of their root, and this will suffice for the very effective hair drug test kit. Often, children will be rebellious and feel a lack of trust if you bring up the subject of having a drug test conducted. Let them know that regardless of the result, the main objective isn't to make things harder on them, but to simply put your mind at ease.

5. Use The Internet

There are are countless websites and companies that offer home drug-testing kits. Look and compare. Find out if there are reviews for the testing kit you are considering to buy. This will be beneficial on your part since you will be able to learn more about the product you are planning to buy as well as comparisons with other products out in the market. Your choices will increase and you will be able to buy the best the market has to offer.

The ideas in your head will rule your world

It does not matter where the ideas come from, and it doesn't matter whether they are right or wrong, once an idea is in your head, it will rule your world.

Only a few months ago I gave a keynote address to 3,000 people at a regional parenting conference. In the talk I had mentioned the difficulties parents face with Drug abuse by their children. During the question and answer period following my talk a clergyman stood up in front of and offered, "I think we need to decriminalize drugs because drug use is a victimless crime." He was offering this as a counter point to my comments in my address about how damaging drugs are to American youth.

My first reaction to this man's comment was sheer astonishment. I could not believe that Clergyman was willing to stand in front of all of these people and say that. Then I realized that he had an idea that was ruling his world. Not only did I disagree with him, but I also have a very different idea that rules my world.

I replied, "I disagree! I do not believe that drug use is a victimless crime! In my 29 years of teaching 46 kids who sat in my classroom are now dead."

And then continuing to address the fellow, I said, "Now, sir, please listen carefully to how those 46 young people died. Three of them died of causes that might not have been preventable. One boy died of a disease; one girl died when an airbag in a car exploded unexpectedly in her face during a slow moving accident in a shopping mall parking lot; and the third died in a private airplane crash while flying with his father.

But, sir, hold onto your seat and ask yourself if you still can consider drug use as a victimless crime when I tell you that the other 43 kids were either stoned, high, or drunk at the time that they died! Those kids were all victims of drug use! And that figure is just the tip of the iceberg. Every member of those kids' families, their friends, their teachers, their coaches, their pastors, and the other people who loved them were hurt by their drug use and were all victims, too!"

That clergyman had an idea that was ruling his world: He was willing to stake his personal reputation in front of 3,000 people on the idea that illicit drug use is victimless!

That idea was ruling his world! It did not matter to him what I had just said. The idea in his head was so powerful that he did not even listen to what I had said, rather, choosing to form a smart retort. I don't know where his idea came from and I am pretty sure his idea is wrong, but nonetheless it is ruling his world.

Ideas are powerful. Even wrong ideas are powerful. In the hands of an overzealous person a wrong idea can overpower a right idea.

As parents it is our job to help children to load their heads with strong ideas to use in making all of those decisions they are going to make. We must find ways to communicate those ideas in a manner that our children can use them.

One of the keys in communicating ideas to children lies in listening carefully to them. Lectures seldom pass on ideas to others. Two way communication is the best way to share ideas with kids. Allow children to challenge your ideas without becoming argumentative.

Good ideas are the vaccination against bad decisions. Vaccinate your children with your values and ethical thoughts.

Saving for your childs college education

Paying for college is one of the largest expenses a parent will face in their lifetime, other than paying for a house. Because of this, care needs to be taken as well as special planning and allocations of finances in order to take the burden away from this expense. Starting early is the best option, even when your child is a toddler is not too soon. Consider the following timeline for saving for your child’s college education.

When college is 15 years or more away, then you should open and education IRA that will allow you to save conservatively for your child’s college. Also, since there is a lot of time before your child will need the money this is the time to invest in aggressive funds or stocks. As the time for college nears, you will want to save money in conservative ways, but now is ok to be aggressive if you wish.

When college is 10-15 years away for your child, then there are some additional things you can do. First, consider prepaid tuition plans that allow you to pay for college over a period of time before your child ever reaches the first day of school. The problem with this is you take the decision away from your child of which college they want to attend. Also, talk to your accountant about different savings plans your state offers for college savings. More than likely, there are some plans that will help you meet your savings needs or receive tax breaks. Also, make sure your portfolio is more secure and stabilized. Try to get your investments in order and start saving more conservatively.

At the five to 10 year mark, you will need to start moving your money into different accounts or bonds. For example, bonds are a good option as well as fixed income. If you are unsure, talk to a financial planner to help you make the decision.

When there are only five more years until your child enters college, make sure your investments are safe and secure and not in any aggressive funds. This is the time to guard the money rather than risk it on aggressive markets.

If you realize that even though you have been saving for more than 15 years, you will not have enough money to pay for your child’s tuition, you can consider different student loans that do not need to be paid back while the child is enrolled in school and that have low interest rates. There are loans available for the parent as well as the child, so whatever works for your family is the best option.

Also, once your child is actively enrolled in college there are different tax breaks that you can file on your tax return that will help out significantly. When it comes to paying for college, starting early and making a plan is the best way to go about it.

6 great habits to improve your children s immunity

It is normal for your little kids to get fever, cough, or cold once in a while. However, don't let the virus and bacteria disrupt their development.

Therefore, boost your kids' immune system by doing these smart habits:

1. Breastfeeding

There's no doubt that breast milk provides the best and complete nutrition for babies ever since they were born. The yellow colostrums, which come out in the early days after the labor, are proved to have antibodies that can protect babies from many illnesses, such as diarrhea and meningitis.

2. Consuming Fruits and Veggies

Fruits and vegetables are great sources of vitamins and minerals, as well as other nutrients to boost your kids' health. Having them in daily menu will prevent your loved ones from infection.

3. Making Hygiene as a Way of Life

Washing their hands with soap is a very good start. Always do it before having meals, after using bathroom, after playing, and after handling their pets.

4. Having Enough Sleep

Lack of sleep can lead to the decline of body's immunity. Taking a nap everyday is a good way to make your children have enough sleep. If they refuse it, put them to bed earlier in the evening.

5. Doing Exercises or Outdoor Activities

Ask them to join you doing exercises or enjoy playing outside together because these activities will increase your kids' endurance. Playing soccer, hiking, and swimming are examples of exciting activities you can do with them.

6. Saying No to Tobacco

Smoking is so unhealthy. The smoke is even more damaging. If you or any other adults in the house smoke, better let go that bad habit for the sake of your kids' health.

Simple habits, right? Yet you probably don't recognize how important they are for your kids' fitness. Talk about this with your spouse and both of you can start a new beginning with healthier kids and family.

Why first borns fuss seconds are resilient and youngests like to laugh

How can two or three children in the same family be so different? They are brought up in the same broad social environment, under a similar set of rules and an identical family value system. They also come from the same genetic pool yet they can be so different in personality, interests and achievement. While they may be born into the same family they are not born into the same position. The effects of their birth position have a significant impact on children, their behavior and their personalities. In order to really understand children it is useful to look at how their position in the family impacts on their development.

If we look at the big three in birth order – first, middle and youngest – we will notice that children born in each position share a similar set of characteristics. Note that birth order presents possibilities only for parents. Also only children share similar birth order characteristics to first borns – they are super first borns.

First borns are often more motivated to achieve than later borns. A greater percentage of first borns end up in the professions such as medicine and law. They go for jobs where determination, strong powers of concentration and discipline are valued. First borns are born into a pressured yet treasured position. They are usually the objects of great delight in a family – they are the first. Parents and grandparents often overdo everything with first borns. There is an air of expectancy even before their birth. Names are chosen half way through the pregnancy and photo albums are filled as baby’s every special moment is captured on film. They are the centre of attention, which is an obvious plus if you are a first-born child.

The flipside to this adulation is that first borns are coached, prodded and pushed to perform. The expectations are high for first borns, particularly first-born boys, so pressure is something they know all about. It is no coincidence that anecdotal evidence suggest that first born males tend to be lower risk-takers as learners than girls or those in other birth positions. First-born boys fear failure so they often steer away from areas where they can’t excel. Interestingly, some first borns confuse excellence with perfectionism and won’t try unless they can do the perfect job. These kids drive their parents and teachers nuts as they just won’t move out of their comfort zones to take a few risks and even (shock, horror) mess up. This is first-born thing.

First borns are trailblazers for parents and for the children to follow. Parents are usually hardest on their first borns in terms of discipline and they loosen up as they move further down the family. First borns usually don’t react well to the arrival of the second born. To parents the arrival of another child means a playmate for their eldest. To the first born the arrival of another child means only one thing – DETHRONEMENT. You can read the headlines: “The emperor loses his crown.” Well not quite. The first-born child does everything in his of her power to retain the favoured first position. He will point out the failings of the second born to his parents. In all likelihood as he grows up the first born may well be less than pleasant to this intruder – particularly if they are both boys.

According to Kevin Leman author of The New Birth Order Book there are two types of first borns. The first are the compliant nurturers and caregivers. These children love to please and also love to do well in school as they have a high need for mum or dad’s approval. They also like to look after and care for other children. These compliant nurturers are more likely to be girls. Parents often rely heavily on their first borns and let them take much of the responsibility around the home.

The second types of first borns are the aggressive movers and shakers. These children are assertive, achievement-oriented and strong-willed. They are often boys who have the drive but not the skills to be effective leaders. Their bull-in-a-China-shop approach doesn’t always endear them to others.

The middle (and in all likelihood the second) child is influenced by his elder sibling. The one rule of thumb about birth order is that children are directly influenced by the sibling above and will differ from that sibling. Frank Sulloway, the author of Born To Rebel, puts it succinctly, when he says that the first rule of the sibling road is that first and second borns will be different in personality, interests and achievement. Generally, the middle or second will be what the first-born isn’t. If the first born is responsible the next in line may well be a pest. If the first born is serious, as they often are, the second borns may well be easy-going and gregarious.

Middle born children are victims of bad timing. Born too late to get the perks and privileges of being born first but too early to get the easy ride that youngest receive, middles often feel squeezed between these two siblings and wonder, “Why me?” or “Its not fair!” The positive side to middle borns is that as they are squeezed between two siblings they are good negotiators and generally develop an adept set of people skills. They are often more flexible as their lives tend to fit in more with the first born. Also they tend to spend more time with children away from their family to avoid the frustration of being an outsider in the family. Middle children subsequently can end up with more friends than their elder sibling.

Middle born children, particularly if they are surrounded by other boys often become the free spirit or the child most likely to upset (annoy, hassle) his siblings. If you have three children sitting quietly watching television and you suddenly hear a yelp coming from the television room you can bet that the middle child has disturbed the peace in some way. Perhaps he has thumped the youngest or flicked the eldest with a ruler or some foreign object. Middles can be like that! They like to get even!

Parents need to be aware of the need to make middle children feel SPECIAL. Take photos of just them, and not the whole pack. Make sure you spend time with just them. Help them find their special talent that they don’t share with their siblings (that should be easy as they often stand apart).

Youngest children in the family are typically charmers and manipulators. They love to get their own way – and they invariably do. They are in the fortunate position of having a sibling break their parents in for them and they don’t have the pressures of the first born. Their birth is not the big event as was the first born’s arrival. Parents are still thinking of a name when they are putting the birth notice for the youngest in the paper. “Ah what will we call him? Jarrod will do. Yeah, that sounds fine.”

Youngest are often babied, spoiled, affectionate, outgoing and uncomplicated. The pressure is off the last borns in terms of having to meet their parents’ high expectations so they are more likely to achieve in their own ways. Creative, artistic pursuits are full of later or last borns, whereas firstborns are more likely to end up in positions of leadership. One of the traits many last borns share is persistence. They learn when they are young that if they persist with what they want they will outlast their siblings and wear their parents down eventually. Persistence is a characteristic that pays off for this group.

Last borns tend to be more impetuous – they act now and worry about the repercussions later. The positive is that they are more likely to stretch themselves and try new experiences than their siblings. The negative aspect for boys is that their tendency to jump first and think later on can be downright dangerous. Youngest born girls can often be babied and have their parents jumping through hoops to satisfy them.

Last borns can appear a little self-centred, which is probably due to the fact that they tend to do less at home to help others. There are bigger, more capable siblings at home to take all the responsibilities so youngest children can easily grow up with an ‘I’m here to be served’ attitude. It is important to give youngest borns plenty of opportunities to help around the home.

The position a child in his family holds is a predictor only of personality, but a powerful predictor nonetheless. It is definitely a factor that parents need to consider as we look for ways to raise happy, well-adjusted and confident children.

Michael Grose is an authority on birth order and affects on children’s personalities, interests and achievements. Read more about how birth order affects personality and behaviour in his brand new book Why first borns rule the world and last borns want to change it. You can purchase it for only $27.50 at Parentingideas. com. au

Learning the skills of parenting

Parents unite! Complex as it is, it is possible to rear children into responsible, happy and well-adjusted adults. From our end as parents, it will take patience and commitment. However, it will also take wisdom and experience. This is where our support system and access to those who know will play a big role.

No doubt parenting has its priceless rewards. No treasure could equal having our own flesh and blood continue the family line and seeing facets of ourselves in sons and daughters. We all look forward to seeing our grandchildren around us during visits and warm family gatherings. Grandchildren (well supported and taken cared of by their parents of course) are the rewards of old age.

It is a fact though, that being a parent is stressful and demanding. We are faced with situations that would require Solomon’s wisdom. Unfortunately, as most of us know, we are no Solomon. We face a thousand and one issues everyday.

For most of us who have been in this parenting business for more than 10 years, we found out that just when we knew all the answers, they changed all the questions! The issues differ from pregnancy to babies, from babies to toddlers, from toddlers to pre-schoolers. These go on and on until our precious children reach adulthood and have families of their own.

This might sound scary to first timers. However, we must remember that for every stressful situation, they are magical moments and lots of them. We just have to learn to appreciate them when they come and not be bogged down with the challenges of the day. Children, trying as they are most of the time, are a great source of joy.

When these situations and issues come though, don’t we just wish that there is someone who could give us advice? We seek out that special parent who has gone through the same ordeal we are now in yet came out triumphant. How we wish we had a support group to discuss certain “case studies” so much like our own and find a list of solutions and alternatives. Then we could go back to our parenting with renewed confidence and hope instead of feeling hopeless and distraught.

Being parents, being good parents is challenging. No, it’s not just challenging. It’s tough! It is more than just providing for the material needs of our children. We’d like to be there for them, raise them to be winners or at least equip them with what they need to make a go at life.

On top of being parents, we are also faced with the challenges of our own careers, our relationships and our dreams. We have inner conflicts that we have to deal with. We have seemingly mundane tasks that are a necessary part of life. Don’t we just wish we could find out how other parents cope? Just maybe, they have strategies to share with us or us with them. We all have our unique experiences that when shared could enrich each other.

It’s really all about sharing what we know, what we have gone through, what works and what may not work. It’s all about us and our children. It’s all about being parents and what we could do to make each other better parents. Parenting is actually one long roller coaster ride for a lot of us. We could either be alone and agonize all through out the ride or with the help of others, enjoy it to the fullest.

Parental control - tv rating system

With the increase of sex and violence on television, or as George Carlin likes to delicately put it, "Sax and Violins", parents have to be more careful than ever about what they allow their children to watch. But how do they do that? Unless they've got some kind of guide or know every movie that's ever come out there is just no way they can possibly know if a movie or program is suitable for their child.

The TV rating system to the rescue.

Essentially, the TV rating system is a system put in place that evaluates a programs sex and violence content and rates the program accordingly. This rating is then displayed, usually at the left hand corner of your TV screen. This way, when you turn a program on you will immediately know if it is something you want your child to watch. How? Well, the ratings are pretty well defined, though there are some gray areas.

Let's cover the basic ratings so you have an idea of what to expect.

TV Y - This is the lowest, or least offensive rating. A program with a TV Y rating is deemed to be appropriate for children of all ages. This can be either animated or live action. The themes of these programs are usually also geared to a very young audience between the ages of 2 and 6. This program should in no way frighten a young child.

TV Y7 - This program is usually designed for children age 7 and older. Usually this type of program is geared to children who can differentiate between make believe and reality. There may be some mild fantasy themes or comedic violence. It might be possible for children under 7 to be scared by these shows. If a show has a great deal of fantasy violence then it may be given a qualifier to this rating and be designated TV Y7 FV.

TV G - This program is for people of all ages. It is not specifically intended for young children but should be okay for them to watch. These are usually your family oriented shows that rarely if ever contain themes that may be inappropriate for children.

TV PG - This program may contain material that is not suitable for young children like mild violence or suggestions of sex. Parents may want to watch these shows with their children to answer any questions they may have about it. These programs occasionally will also have some suggestive language. TV PG shows will usually have a qualifier attached to them as well such as V for mild violence, L for language or S for sexual situations.

TV 14 - This program is for children over the age of 14. Parents are strongly cautioned to watch these shows with their kids. These programs usually have either intense violence, strong sexual situations, strong language or very suggestive dialogue.

TV MA - These programs are intended for mature audiences only. These are usually not for children under 17 and usually contain either graphic violence, explicit sex, or very crude language. Qualifiers will be attached to these as well so the parent knows what is contained. But most likely it won't matter as they probably won't want their kids to watch these shows anyway.

With the above guidelines, parents should have no trouble monitoring what they want their children to watch.