How soon should you begin dating after getting dumped

This is a very common problem for many of us. Getting dumped hurts a lot. But one wants to go back to good life as early as possible, if for nothing than to forget the earlier pain. But since the pain remains and the thought of being hit again is overwhelming, it becomes difficult to decide.

When should one go back to dating scene after getting dumped? The answer for this question will vary from individual to individual. If your earlier partnership lasted for few months, you can recover sooner, but if the earlier partnership lasted for some years, it takes a lot more time to get prepared mentally to go back to the dating scene. The old wounds take a lot more time to heal, and sometimes they may never heal. If at this point of time, you manage to get a dating partner who understands and helps you come out of the memories, you are very lucky.

When you seriously date someone, you get involved. You plan for the future and you are recognized as a regular date of that person amongst your friends. You also give your trust to that person. You care for him/her and make many sacrifices to keep the relationship going. You dream of a bright future ahead and even make every move with consultation. This makes you both very involved with each other. If at this point, you are dumped, you will take lot of healing to come over the bitterness. You might have lost your faith in the opposite sex. So what is to be done?

Involve yourself with your work. Take up a new hobby. Make new friends. Join a club. Go around and enjoy the nature. And whenever you feel the pain of earlier love, feel it intensely. It does not help to push those feelings behind. They will remain there to resurface again. So feel every pain and cry over the loss if necessary. Express the anger and the bitterness. Cleanse yourself as much as possible of the memories.

After you are sure that you have regained your emotional stability, go back to the dating scene. If you find some one interesting with understanding, tell all after few meetings and ask for help and love in return of love. God willing, you will get it.

The varieties of wisdom

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PERSONAL WISDOM

At every moment in our lives we face some real-life situation, some fact-based reality. But what do those facts MEAN? And what's the best thing to DO about them? Wisdom answers the first question by looking at the situation from a variety of helpful perspectives. It answers the second by bringing wise values into the decision-making process. There are many of these "wise ways of seeing," and many "wise values." In wise people these basic building blocks of wisdom combine in various ways to create an array of "wise attitudes" and "wise ways of being." And because the mix of characteristics differs from person to person, each wise person's wisdom has a distinctive character or "flavor."

A key point is that personal wisdom is internal, embodied by persons. Words of wisdom arise from it. Wise behavior arises from it. Socio-Cultural wisdom arises from it. But wisdom itself is not its products. Rather, it's a mode of cognition — one that couples relevant intellectual knowledge with some important perspectives, interpretations, explanatory frameworks, and values. Wisdom is a kind of meta-knowledge that helps us make better sense of the rest of our knowledge.

Aristotle differentiated between two kinds of wisdom: practical wisdom, and existential/metaphysical wisdom. I would add a third variation on the theme: activist, change-the-world wisdom.

1. Practical or "life-centered" wisdom is an information-processing modality — one in which everyday situations are evaluated comprehensively, from many points of view. Howard Gardner wrote, "The defining characteristic of wisdom is the breadth of considerations taken into account when rendering a judgment or recommending a course of action." Wisdom asks: Will this work? What are the consequences? Does this fit with my goals? Is this part of the problem or part of the solution? Does this represent excellence? Is this fair? Is it right? Is action needed or not needed? — plus many others.

2. Big picture, existential wisdom is a variety that Eastern spiritual practices help to develop. Rational evaluation still plays a role in this form of wisdom, but rationality is not enough. That's because the goal is insight into both the informational aspect of reality (that is, form and appearance) and the noninformational aspect (Being, Spirit, Energy, and Awareness). Eastern practices develop and harness the psychological modalities of intuition and identification. These modes of cognition potentially allow us to see beyond the transient to the eternal. Beyond Maya to Brahman. Beyond form to the carrier of form.

3. Activist wisdom combines a high level of psychological/spiritual development with the development of broadly based intellectual understanding (the humanities plus the sciences plus economics). Here, too, mind-quieting practices are used to develop self-knowledge and a broadening of sense-of-self identification.

SOCIO-CULTURAL WISDOM

Societal institutions — corporations, political systems, economies, NGOs — are purposeful entities. They exist to perform certain functions and to behave in certain ways. And that behavior is directed by values. Those values are typically a combination of the personal values of the people who created the institutions in the first place, the values of the people who currently run them, and values imposed from outside, such as laws and the interpretation of those laws by courts.

Some institutions were imbued with wise values at their founding, but were co-opted later. Among the drafters of the US Constitution and Bill of Rights were some very wise people, and that wisdom was reflected in the governmental structures they created. But they couldn't anticipate every future happening, nor build into the constitution every possible protection. As early as the 1860s Lincoln warned about the control that big money could exert over government. And that has clearly happened in the years since then.

Economies are another example. Economies were created as societal subsystems to provision people. Group A had more of some good than it needed, and it traded the excess to Group B for a different good. The provisioning function hasn't disappeared, but today's economies and their institutions have superimposed other purposes on top of the original one. Making a lot of money for a small group of people has become the primary purpose; benefits to society are secondary. The economic TAIL now wags the societal DOG. It doesn't have to be this way. Governments can be configured to serve the many instead of the few. And the original purpose of economies can be restored.

In my view, a wisdom-based society would be one in which many of the high values that guide the lives of wise people would also guide society's institutions. Among those values would be truth, honesty, justice, cooperation, peace, compassion, universal well-being, creativity, and comprehensive knowledge. These values would be implanted into institutional systems in ways that insured, as far as possible, wise institutional behavior. And the institutions would be run in such a way that those values would be maintained on into the future.

It's important to note that there is a mutual feedback relationship between personal wisdom and societal wisdom. It starts with personal wisdom. If a societal institution ends up being guided by wise values, it is almost certainly because wise people designed them in. So there is a creative movement from wise people to wise institutions. But it also works in the other direction. Wise societal institutions support and encourage the development of wisdom in individuals.

Parental control - tv rating system

With the increase of sex and violence on television, or as George Carlin likes to delicately put it, "Sax and Violins", parents have to be more careful than ever about what they allow their children to watch. But how do they do that? Unless they've got some kind of guide or know every movie that's ever come out there is just no way they can possibly know if a movie or program is suitable for their child.

The TV rating system to the rescue.

Essentially, the TV rating system is a system put in place that evaluates a programs sex and violence content and rates the program accordingly. This rating is then displayed, usually at the left hand corner of your TV screen. This way, when you turn a program on you will immediately know if it is something you want your child to watch. How? Well, the ratings are pretty well defined, though there are some gray areas.

Let's cover the basic ratings so you have an idea of what to expect.

TV Y - This is the lowest, or least offensive rating. A program with a TV Y rating is deemed to be appropriate for children of all ages. This can be either animated or live action. The themes of these programs are usually also geared to a very young audience between the ages of 2 and 6. This program should in no way frighten a young child.

TV Y7 - This program is usually designed for children age 7 and older. Usually this type of program is geared to children who can differentiate between make believe and reality. There may be some mild fantasy themes or comedic violence. It might be possible for children under 7 to be scared by these shows. If a show has a great deal of fantasy violence then it may be given a qualifier to this rating and be designated TV Y7 FV.

TV G - This program is for people of all ages. It is not specifically intended for young children but should be okay for them to watch. These are usually your family oriented shows that rarely if ever contain themes that may be inappropriate for children.

TV PG - This program may contain material that is not suitable for young children like mild violence or suggestions of sex. Parents may want to watch these shows with their children to answer any questions they may have about it. These programs occasionally will also have some suggestive language. TV PG shows will usually have a qualifier attached to them as well such as V for mild violence, L for language or S for sexual situations.

TV 14 - This program is for children over the age of 14. Parents are strongly cautioned to watch these shows with their kids. These programs usually have either intense violence, strong sexual situations, strong language or very suggestive dialogue.

TV MA - These programs are intended for mature audiences only. These are usually not for children under 17 and usually contain either graphic violence, explicit sex, or very crude language. Qualifiers will be attached to these as well so the parent knows what is contained. But most likely it won't matter as they probably won't want their kids to watch these shows anyway.

With the above guidelines, parents should have no trouble monitoring what they want their children to watch.

A chef does this and that

An online dictionary defines a chef as the chief cook of a restaurant establishment or a hotel. The chef is usually the one responsible for planning what is needed for the food preparation, menu, and everything that is related to kitchen and food matters.

As for becoming the chef, one must realize and understand that it is not all about cooking. A big part of being creative is needed in becoming a successful chef. Aside from planning the daily menu, a chef also needs to be in the kitchen doing all the “kitchen stuff” that is necessary. It doesn't sound like it requires a lot of work but if you try to get to the fundamentals, you'll realize that cutting, chopping, stirring and a lot of action words are all needed in completing the job of a chef.

And then you ask, what does it really take to become a good chef? First of all, if you don't have any appreciation on how a restaurant food is prepared, then you don't have any idea how chefs work. It isn't easy being a chef. There are a lot of areas you will need to concentrate on. Apart from that general view, the way you present your food and maintain consistency in doing it is an art at its finest. It may seem simple for the untrained eye, but for a chef, it took a lot of thinking and diligence to achieve the perfect taste and appearance of a food.

Relying on your creative skill is one major factor to becoming a great chef. But of course, as you learn how to become one, the questions you should ask yourself are, can you handle doing several things at a time? Can you work under pressure? As you can see, a chef thinks and then put his thoughts in to actions. At the same time, there are constant questions and demands that a chef may get from other cooks in the kitchen; even customers may request a specialty out of the blue and a chef, should learn how to comply.

Working under pressure is one thing a chef experiences in a normal basis but of course, loving what you do is most important. As long as you learn from your everyday experiences and grow from it, you'll do just fine.

Blackjack learn how to become a champion

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Learn How to Play and Win Blackjack after practicing some basic steps that can be learn easily. Blackjack is one of the more easier card games that you will come across, and its basic concept is simple: get 21 as the sum of your cards or get as close to 21 but higher than the sum of your opponent's cards.

1) Do not try and reach 21.
Yes. Even though blackjack is also commonly called 21, trying to reach 21 with every hand is an amateurish move. You will, most certainly, lose the hand. Statistical research conducted has shown that the odds of reaching 21 is lesser than the odds of getting more than 21.

2) Try and Beat the Dealer.
Since blackjack is a one on one battle: you versus the dealer, focus on beating the dealer. Instead of trying to get 21, try to guess what hand the dealer will receive and accordingly play your hand. Remember that the dealer at a regular casino or even at an online casino has to stop taking more cards if the cards on the table add up to 17. But if their cards add up to 16 or any number less, they will have to take another card.

3) Look at the dealer's card facing up.
The only way to play is to look at the dealer's card facing up. If it is a low card like a two or anything up to a 6 or 7, try and get a high number combination. If it’s a 9 or 10, the odds are high that he has a 10 underneath or at least he will be forced to take another card. So, reach anything up to 20 or 21, but its better to even stop at a 18 or 19 and hope they will over-run the sum of 21.

How Blackjack is Played at a Casino:
1) Place your bet on the table.
Each blackjack table has a set beginning bet and this ranges from a dollar to ten or twenty for the high-rollers crowd. This is the amount of chips you will have to put down, and this signals to the dealer that you are taking part in the next round.

2) You will get a card.
The dealer then deals a card to you and all the other players who have also placed a bet down.

3) The dealer places a face-up card in front.
This is one of the cards of the dealer, and since its facing up, all the players have a chance to judge the outcome of his cards.

4) The dealer deals the second card.
The dealer, then, deals you and all the players an additional card. This is the time to have a look at them and at the dealer's card and decide whether you wish to get another card.

5) The dealer asks.
The dealer now turns to each player and asks them if they wish to receive another card. If you wish it, the dealer will give you a card. Then, the dealer will ask you again. Note that the dealer will be with you until you decide that you do not want to receive any more cards. Then, the dealer moves on to the next player, then, the next, and so on.

6) The dealer starts playing.
Only when all the players have said that they do not want any more cards, does the dealer start playing. He takes cards until he has reached 17 or above. Then, he has to stop.

7) The dealer opens the cards.
When he's done, the dealer first reveals all his cards. Then, he moves from one player to the other opening their cards. After revealing each player's hands, the dealer pays out the bet or takes the bet away according to who has won and who has lost.

Write queen gets on her soap box

_Freda Douglas is an accomplished author. Not only did she write a personal essay for a newspaper 17 years, she had her first book released in 2002 “Cherish the Past” which is still available on Amazon. com. Freda says her second book “Winds of Change” will be released this Fall. Freda lives in Alabama with her cat Jewely and loves to hear from her readers and visitors.

I spend a lot of time on the computer. Although I am an illiterate techie I am very literate on the keyboard. There are some things that grossly irritate me about cyberspace that really annoy me.

First of all, let’s take the websites which tell you ‘all you have to do is sign up, we’ll do all the work and you’ll get rich’ If you believe that I’ve got a gold mine in Alaska I’ll sell you cheap.

You would like to believe all people are as honest as you are, but it is difficult sometimes. I made a purchase on April 24, 2007 that cost me $127 which I paid for with a debit card. I no more had bought it when I realized that with my computer illiteracy I wouldn’t be able to use it. I immediately called the man who sold it and explained the situation. He assured me I would have the refund by the end of the week. I am writing this July 8 and I still don’t have the refund,

Take the people who try to sell you something that is grossly over priced, not because it is worth it, but because he/she has a name that everybody knows and they think that people will buy because of who they are.

Who is even worse, in my estimation, is the person who jumps on the bandwagon and offers the buyer a ‘HUGE’ bonus if you’ll buy the same over priced article from him instead. Who’s he trying to kid? That bonus has to be downloaded (by you), you will probably never use it, it costs you paper, ink, wear on your printer and might have cost the benevolent soul that ‘gave’ it to you

a whole dollar to create.

I am a push over for books. I hate to think of the money I spent on them. Several months ago I was offered an ebook by somebody who I never heard of but the title was something that interested me so ordered it for $97. I read the whole book and not one word was ever written about the subject I was interested in and needless to say he wouldn’t give me a refund and also needless to say I have not read any of his emails since. Once burned…

I am not disillusioned by my experiences, but I have been on the Internet to see the seamy side of it. Most of my readers are common people like I am and I beg of you – do be careful when you are on the Internet.

Is all fair in love war and dating blogs

People blog about just about anything these days, from celebrities to restaurants to their painful dayjobs and everything in between. It seems like everyone and their cat (seriously, cats CAN have blogs too), has something to say. Thanks to the internet, and free blog space, everyone is able to broadcast whatever they want to out in the internet universe. Since online dating and social networking are among the most popular uses for the internet, its only natural that dating would become one of the many topics for blogs. But, people aren't only blogging about their dates, but also integrating blogging into their dating lives.

But what about the privacy issues with people featured in these dating blogs? Is it necessary for authors to disclose that their date could possibly be turned into humorous material to be broadcast all around the internet? Is it unfair to the unsuspecting dates to be taken out simply for the purpose of generating “material”, with no intentions for future meetings?

With few regulations about the material that can or cannot be posted in blogs, it can be difficult to monitor how authors obtain the information they post in their blogs. Since blogs are also highly personal, and often written for and by the public, there's no reason that someone cannot write about their own experiences, whether they are true or not (that's called fiction, folks), and regardless of how they got their information. While this freedom is an enormous advantage for writers, and can be used to create a lot of good (think free speech, and enabling people to react to biased sources etc.), there are undoubtedly people who may not think twice about being “ethical journalists”, mostly cause, well, for the most part blog authors not journalists. In the end, this opens up a free-for-all of sorts, that allows people to write about whatever they want, in any way they want, including in dating blogs.

Unfortunately, this may lead to some casualties along the way, in terms of personal embarrassment or privacy in the dating world. But, perhaps blogging is just another part of the risks involved with the modern world of dating. Hopefully the authors of dating blogs will keep privacy issues in mind (aside from just their own),and respect the dignity of the people who agree to go out with them.